This morning, like most mornings, I arrived to work early. I checked for any sign of life within the office, before realizing that the coast was clear and that I could go ahead and put phase #2 of 'Make Matthew go Mad' into operation.
I took off my shoes to sneak into his cube. I don't really know why. I put gloves on, again, not sure why. I took a cut up piece of hot dog, taken from the lunch that was prepared for me from left overs from the girl who rocks my world, and dabbed it with a tissue. Just to be safe.
On Matthews desk is a desk fan. This is not company issued, but brought from home and paraded for all to see. The company supplied fan has two speeds, Matthews four. The company supplied fan is an off white color, Matthew's jet black with chrome accents. The company supplied fan has nothing on the back. Matthew's fan now has a cut up hot dog, taped to its reverse.
When it gets hot, this dog will stink. When the fan is turned on, the dog will blow rank air into his pretty little face. It's the least that he deserves.
1 comment:
Well done...well done...I say that in the form of encouragement. I have known a 'Mathew' on my cell block also...Mr. Perfect...has never walked out of a bathroom with toilet paper on his shoe, the SOB. Fortunately for me and my chain-gangies at day labor, the bastid (New Yorker) fell victim of the Peter Principle and moved up the ladder, to a cell block closer to street level...good luck, er, bonne fortune!
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